FORM ODCV-1A · REV. 11/2026
Is a civil war happening?
NO
Current Civil War Status: Not happening.
Status reviewed by the clerk currently nearest the status apparatus.
Threat level
LOWTHANKSGIVING
DINNERHIGH
DINNERHIGH
Social Media Field Report
“Definitely starting tomorrow,” according to a man whose profile picture is a truck.
Answers processed in triplicate
Frequently Anticipated Questions
Someone on the internet said it starts tomorrow.
They said that yesterday.
What about all the people posting pictures of their guns?
Still no.
How will I know when a civil war starts?
We will update this website. Probably.
Is this an emergency information service?
No. The Office is empowered only to determine the status displayed above. For emergency assistance, contact the appropriate local authorities.